What Does the Other Side of PTSD Look Like
Ted Beal
For centuries wars were fought to acquire territory. Victory was accomplished by killing more of the enemy than the enemy killed. Recently wars have become more about ideology than geography and as much about cyberwar as physical war. Yet killing remains critical to victory.
SFC Ron Rosser, WWII and Korean veteran, who was a Medal of Honor winner and recipient of multiple purple hearts, is one of the best killers the U S Army has seen. Rosser recently recounted his story to Greg Karoumbus in “Veteran Chronicles,” American Veterans Center Radio America (October 31, 2019). I listened.
SFC Rosser was born in Columbus Ohio and was the oldest of seventeen children. Inspired by observing a soldier jump out of a hot air balloon, Rosser was 17 when he decided to join the Army and became part of the 82nd Airborne. He jokes that he had many flights in many planes but as a parachutist he never landed in one. He also says, “It is hard to say someone was good at killing other people but I really was good … I enjoyed killing the enemy so I could save these [US} kids.” Rosser spent three years serving during and after WWII and decided he had enough and left the service. In his interview he gives no hint that killing others was something that negatively affected him.
During the Korean War his next oldest brother, a civilian, was killed by a stranger and Rosser signed up to serve in the military once again. “I made up my mind that I was going to kill a lot of people,” he said. He was required to undergo basic training once again and was soon shipped out to occupied Japan. By January 1952, he was transferred to North Korea where the US Army was fighting the Chinese—among others. He was now part of a support company and trained as a forward observer; that is someone who calls in mortar and heavy artillery on the enemy. It was an ideal position, Rosser believed, from which to kill.
Many soldiers describe their first combat experience under fire to be nothing like their training. It is far more intense and frightening. Rosso described his first experience, however, to be “exactly what I expected—a great risk to self, like living on the edge.” “I am not afraid of dying or of living.” From his forward observing position he was always on the edge of the cauldron of battle. He would establish the coordinates in which the enemy stood and then have his radio man make a call to those who fired the artillery and the mortars.
He said about himself that he did not make friends easily, that he knew almost nobody, and had no relationships with the people firing the artillery except by calling in the geographic coordinates of the enemy. He and his one radio man remained in a forward position in constant danger. He lost eight radio men, five were killed, three were wounded and four had to be sent back because they were too frightened. Rosser says, “I saved a lot of American
lives. Their wives and kids hug me [when I see them]. They get me nervous and make me feel bad.” Did this brave man only get anxious when he was emotionally close to people?
Apparently he set records for killing others. He asserts he killed over 10,000 Chinese and North Korean soldiers via mortars and artillery. He killed over 1,000 a day on at least three days. Furthermore, he killed over 400 people with small arms and grenades, and over 20 people in hand-to-hand combat. “I got good at that stuff,” he says. “I could kill five people at a time with [my] gun butt.” Rosser was wounded four times, but he took care of it himself without seeing a physician.
Rosser recounts one particular battle in a riveting description. His company of 170 men was pinned down by heavy machine gun fire from an overlooking hill. His unit had lost 80% of its soldiers. Two wounded officers thought their only chance was to charge the hill. Rosso volunteered to lead the charge in snow and in 25-below zero weather. By the time he reached the machine gun trench he looked back and everyone else was killed or wounded. He jumped into the trench and began beating the enemy to death with his gun. He knocked out the machine guns with grenades and fired at thirty five Chinese soldiers running down the trench toward him. Under fire, they retreated and he shot them in the back of their heads as they ran away.
After running out of ammunition, Rosser picked up a wounded man and carried him downhill. He passed a machine gun aimed directly at him. He held the wounded soldier in front of him and the Chinese soldier allowed him to pass. Rearmed with more grenades and ammunition, Rosser returned up the hill. He attacked successfully more machine guns until he came face to face with the machine gunner who had given him a free pass. Rosser said, “He saw me and I decided that he gave me a chance in life so I passed him by. I had never done that before. I do not think he fired another shot that day. “
Rosser’s job was to protect 800 soldiers attacked by thousands of Chinese soldiers. “He said he had to thin them out or the kids would all be dead. He added that he “enjoyed killing the enemy, so [he] could save these kids.” He reported, “I got even for a lot of bad things. I was really good at that stuff. It is hard to say someone was good at killing other people but I really was good”
And that is one of the ways our side wins wars. Vengeance, killing, and some forgiveness can be strange bedfellows.
Edward W. Beal, MD, Psychiatrist, Dept. of the Army, Dept. of Tele-Health, U. S. Army
Medical Department Activity,
Fort Meade
